Eeesh…

Eeesh...

This morning it seems like there’s no such thing as a “good photo” for me. Oh dear. This is not good. Ughhh, I have 5 hours to become attractive. Or at least semi-decent.

Anyway, I handed in the damn essay. Guess what? He had left his office door shut AGAIN. So I thought “fuck it” and went in anyway. My part is over. It’s in and done and I don’t even care if it’s shit, it’s out of my hands and no longer my problem.

I haven’t checked it through since I finished it. Pretty sure it’s got no direction and I’m also pretty darn sure I swap sides as to whether credibility is better or incredibility in making a successful drama.

Only 4 subjects today, then 2 acappella club rehearsals. We had one last night, only 3 of us (of 7) showed up and for the first time ever we actually started going through the music. By the end of 30-45 mins we could sing, in three parts, the first two pages of music! So exciting! It wasn’t half-arsed either, it sounded quite decent! So I have high hopes for the two rehearsals today. Everyone should turn up to at least *one* of them and it should be fast enough to go through.

Arghh. Today shouldn’t be horrible. Now… I need to go look up a few facts about one of the evolutionary ancestors.

Can I just take a moment to appreciate that I have no alignments to religion, besides that I’m a little superstitious about numbers, yet a significant portion of my blog followers are religious. I really hope I don’t offend any of you… I really am grateful for your support! Hahaha

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My Latest Gadget

So I downloaded a new free app, it’s a countdown thing.

It tells me exactly how many days/hours/minutes/seconds I have left until I start my exams.

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That’s what it reads RIGHT NOW.

I want to shoot myself. This is why my blog-counter-downer says it’s 1 month I guess…

Hopefully this, coupled with my exam schedule background:

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Will kick my ass into gear. I officially have less than 60 days to learn the rest of ALL my subjects and revise EVERYTHING. My heart rate has actually picked up just thinking about it. I don’t feel at all prepared for this. Maths is done, English is done, Philosophy is done… Chinese is more or less done.

Biology and Chemistry aren’t though.

Chemistry isn’t done.

I have TWO WHOLE OPTIONS left to learn for Chemistry (as opposed to just one in Biology).

*Sobs*

Sincerely

I am sincerely sick of:

  • My school
  • IB
  • Most of my teachers
  • Most of my classmates
  • Myself
  • My life
  • My inability to conquer maths
  • My inability to focus
  • Not being able to read
  • Not being able to write
  • Constantly feeling stressed
  • Constantly feeling tired
  • Constantly feeling sick
  • Constantly feeling guilty
  • Know I am the only one that can fix my situation
  • Coursework
  • Homework
  • Idiots
  • Staying awake
  • Being emotional
  • Wanting to cry or scream every hour
  • Constantly craving chocolate
  • Treating my family like shit because I can’t keep my shit together
  • Treating my friends with disrespect because I don’t have enough self-respect to care
  • Feeling empty
  • Feeling lonely
  • Feeling crowded
  • Feeling fake
  • Feeling unreal
  • Not playing basketball
  • Not playing netball
  • Not being a good singer
  • Never being able to watch T.V.
  • Never being able to watch movies
  • Never being able to properly relax
  • My addiction to tetris
  • My addiction to ribena
  • My obsession with food that’s bad for me
  • My aversion to running
  • My workload
  • My inability to stop caring
  • My inability to care enough
  • My total apathy for the subjects I’m not doing well in
  • My complete lack of regard for those that I’m okay at
  • The way I treat my Bio teacher
  • The way I treat my Philo teacher
  • The fact it’s illegal to kill my Chem teacher in any of the creative ways I think up in class (or at all for that matter)
  • Anything that breathes
  • Anything that doesn’t breathe for that matter…

Just let me get out already.

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After All That Excitement…

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…Back to this tired old crap. Ugh. What is life. IB, WHY?

*Sigh* I suppose it’s not all bad, I mean, “Streetcar” is actually really fun to study, and we’ve only just started to read “Warren’s” but so far I’m enjoying it. It’s funny how annoying it is when you can’t genuinely complain about something because underneath the show you put on, you do actually enjoy the thing you’re whinging about… Surely I’m not the only one to experience that?

Oh well, time to get revising hard again. Tuition soon, again- I’d like to say shoot me, but I really think my tutor is a pretty cool guy, he certainly makes Maths form some kind of sense in my mind. It’s times like these when I question myself as to why the hell I actually thought I was capable of doing Maths SL at IB?!?!?!??!

With 6 months to go before exams, I really shouldn’t be complaining about my subject choices, but I won’t let that stop me.

7 DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!! 😀