3 More High School Wake Ups

Image

So that was a fun morning assembly. Goodness I can’t wait to get out of this damn school. I suppose the silver lining is that that was the very last assembly with my HOY I’ll ever have… except for the graduation assembly we have on Friday that I’ll be leaving early from for rehearsals.

Every damn week he does the countdown.

Today he FINALLY brought up Prom and was like: “oh hey lol there’s a prom email going out tonight lol yeah do the form and get the cheque and bring it in tomorrow or else lol”. I want to throttle him.

Then he went on to talk about Muck Up Day and how it shouldn’t be called “Muck Up” Day and that we’re essentially getting rid of it thanks to last year’s cohort. Which is great. Not. One by one they’re whittling away our “Sixth Form Privileges”.

We have a fire drill during P2 so that should be interesting… today is pretty full on actually…

P1- Normal
P2- Fire drill
Break- Ladakh meeting + See HOY about acapella performance on Friday
P3- Concert rehearsals
P4- Normal (ughhhh it’s English… might try to skip it… but he has DEFINITELY seen me in school so I’ll need to be very careful about how I do this…)
Lunch- Choir rehersals
P5- Normal
P6- Normal (but I have an essay due in that I haven’t done, whoops)
Biology Tuition
Maths Tuition

And then I get to stop and breathe and TRY to get an English essay done for tomorrow. IBFML. No, I am the main reason I’m in this shitty position. I don’t know how to get my act together… I’ll sort it out somehow.

Whatever.

You guys were a bit funny yesterday, the searches that got you here were quite nice!

Image

All except the marshmallow death one were quite sweet! 😛

And This Is Why I Love Him

Honest to god. How could you not completely fall in love with him? I am devoted to his every breath because he is SO DARN ADORABLE!!

This is the first time I’ve ever been so in love with an actor that I ship him with his wife because I just want him to be happy and then THIS happens and I know I made the right decision fangirling over this man.

Jared Padalecki, you are a beautiful, beautiful human being.

Video

Once Upon a Ballpit…

http://www.wimp.com/ballpit/

This is absolutely GORGEOUS! I love it so much! My friend sent it to me and it’s made my day. SO CUTE! Why can’t they do this in Singapore?! (Besides the obvious hygiene problem- some people in Singapore… most people in Singapore… like to spit. Hence SARS was HUGE here…)

GETTING AWAY FROM SAD THINGS- if you’re having a bad day and want a small cute video to cheer you up then watch this! So sweet! Ugh! Too much squee! 😀

Video

Staples <3

Image

This is my best friend Staples (left) and Jimmy, my second best friend (middle). I think that Staples is the nicest friend ANYBODY COULD HAVE, she’s my math buddy, hammock buddy, Mt Kinabalu buddy, aeroplane buddy, badminton buddy, after-school buddy…. man we’re just buddys!

On a serious note though I think that I have so many memories with all my friends in school, and I’m seriously gonna miss them. xoxo gossip girl/ goat

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okay… the above was all written by Staples pretending to me, hurhurhur

PS- “gossip goat” is a local legend/ school prank gone WAYY too far. It happened about December of Year 12 (over a year ago now- I’m in Year 13). Basically, this website “Gossip Goat”, was set up and all these rumours were spread on them. It got shut down pretty quickly, then set up again- it happened about 5-6 times that day, each time the rumours got nastier (we all think that there were copycats by the end of the day as the rumours were targeted at younger and younger yeargroups). No-one really knows who the “goat” was, but we all have our suspicions as to who it was, but it was never officially announced. As far as we know, the “goat” was never caught. It’s quite an insult at our school to call someone a “gossip goat” now, it’s a big accusation… but it’s a joke when you use it within friends. JUST SOME CONTEXT FOR Y’ALL!! 😛

Sports Assembly

Sports Assembly

So I gave my assembly this morning- all 2 or 3 minutes of it (woohoo). The head of P.E. is a bit of a dick… he shouldn’t have the job he has (you only have to meet him once to know that), but whatever, that’s generally the case with most people in my school. *Rolls Eyes*

So let me give you a little history about me and public speaking. I’m quite decent at it. I’ve given dozens of speeches in the past. I got the finals of a public speaking competition (runner up isn’t winner, but it’s not bad! Haha).

So I kinda know what I’m doing when I speak in front of a crowd- but still the head of P.E. decided I needed a pep talk before the assembly started… it was sweet, but annoying (seeing as he can’t give a speech anyway). He told me to stare at the backboard on the other end of the hall… really? Really? No. Eye contact, fluid movement in the neck, move around minimally if necessary to help engage people. Not stand rigidly and stare at a spot above all their heads.

Haha. Oh well. Biology is nearly over. I don’t know if I have Chemistry… I guess I’ll find out soon. I hope we don’t, then I only have 3 lessons today and I can finish work/ sleep (had to get up early and so far I only have a teensy headache but I can tell there’s going to be hell to pay when my eyes start acting up. That should happen soon…)

AND I might be able to watch 3 episodes of ‘Supernatural’ later! Yay! 😀

Image

Post-Goulding Fangirling!

Oh.

Sweet.

Holy.

Jaysus.

Image

This woman is unreal. She is AMAZING! I don’t think I’ve ever been to a better performance. She didn’t drop a note, she didn’t fumble, she was sweet and funny and humble about everything. Ellie Goulding is by far one of the best performers ever- if you ever get the chance to see her live then GO YOU FOOL!

I don’t know how she did it! I’ve been to a few concerts and sure they were fun and had great show value (bread and circuses style, not really about the content, but more the packaging). Not our Ellie girl. Nope, the stage was simple, the lighting was more or less straight forward. Her voice shone. Seriously. Unbelievable. I know all her songs by heart and when she sang them… *pants*

She is a crazy good singer. LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE HER! I have a video from after the concert (she did an autograph session- I already have her CD and am flat broke so I couldn’t buy her CD again in order to be allowed to queue… oh well). She made us wait 50 minutes, but it was worth it when she came out! She hugged the people she signed for… holy crap I can’t even imagine what that must have been like! 😀

So yeah, I’ll try and put the video up at some point (read: don’t count on it, haha).

Ellie Goulding is a goddess on stage. So beautiful. Her voice is flawless and every song she sang probably could have been put onto an album- that’s how good it was. It was almost like she was recording for a live CD. *Sigh*

So yeah, I got home about an hour ago… and selfie-d like crazy. Again. Whoops. Oh well, here are some of them. It’s been a while since I last did this, haha!

Image

Image

Image

I apologise for being so vain (haha), but HEY! It’s my blog! 😀

I have some stuff to do for tomorrow, but I’m quite tired and I can’t decide if I want to stay up and do it now, then sleep at school… or just do it tomorrow. I have to wake up early tomorrow for the damn Sports Assembly… Hmmm. Well I guess if I stay up you’ll know… if I sleep then- NIGHT ALL! 😀

Girl On A Mission

Girl On A Mission

So after the debacle of last night I’ve convinced my mum to let me stay home and work all day. If you can’t read the “To Do” list there on the right then let me tell you what it says:

– TOK
– English P2 Mock
– Chem (Colour IA)
– Chinese Oral Prep
– Maths Worksheets
– Philo Essay Plans
– Bio Past Paper
– World Lit Finalising
– Revision Notes

The other 3 are just extras (renew library books, blog, wattpad), stuff to do should I finish everything and I’m sure you’d agree (after seeing the first list) that that isn’t likely today, haha.

My top priority is TOK, then I’ll focus on World Lit, then Chem. Once those 3 are cleared then I’ll start figuring out about the rest of them because those 3 are the ones due tomorrow (well Chem is *kinda* due, but it’s final deadline in Monday). IF there is any time after those three, my next priority is the freaking English P2 mock that I’ve avoided for the past week… 😛

Apparently there’s another IB convention at our school tomorrow (AGAIN! UGH!)… the only upshot is that my English teacher will probably be there (and therefore not in class), same with my TOK teacher so I can do finishing touches on the essay if necessary. Who else… yeah I think that’s it, which would mean I only have… 2 classes with teachers tomorrow? Ish? Yay!

AND!

Perhaps most importantly… WATTPAD WILL BE UNBLOCKED! Not only on Friday, but most likely for the entire weekend too! 😀

Mind you, I really need to get a wriggle on with my revision notes so I’ll try my best to stay away from the temptations this weekend. There’s 2 months or so left, the harder I work now, the sweeter the freedom of post-IB will be. I have to dissociate the stress from my work and keep my head above water.

This week alone I have handed in:
– My Philosophy IA (I GOT 27/30!!!! LEVEL 7!!! That all-nighter was so damn worth it!!)
– My final CAS Reflection
– My World Lit essay (final edits in by tomorrow so that anything desperate can be changed by Wednesday before they’re all sent off on Thursday next week)

Wow… okay… that’s a smaller list than I’d anticipated. I’d expected to have… whatever… it feels like a lot more than just that. As far as IB goes, that’s a huge amount of coursework GONE! Philosophy is officially finished now, English will be the second I hand in my final final draft, CAS is officially finished… yeah. Ok, it feels like a lot more than just that but whatever. I have survived 3 major deadlines AND a Parent-Teacher Evening. That’s impressive.

Now just to finish the rest of it. Once this TOK essay is in, that’s it, I’m done with TOK and then get 2 extra free periods a week! 😀

My Mondays and Fridays will be so sweet! 😀

Now to focus on the big stuff. Exams. The sooner I hand in all this coursework, the sooner I can revise, the sooner I revise, the sooner I can start believing I stand a chance at getting 6’s and 7’s in my exams.

AND SO! Filled with determination, our protagonist sets off into the sunset of her IB deadlines, fighting the foes of IB monsters and leaving level 7’s in her wake. Fight on, weary child, fight on.

Image

At Last This Ghastly Day is Over

At Last This Ghastly Day is Over

So mum took me out for dinner and some shopping because we got bored sitting at home. It was really nice… until I nearly killed myself due to my dinner choice (congee at Takashimaya really isn’t that nice… and they put these weird ass peanuts on top! They didn’t *look* like peanuts so you can’t blame me for not recognising them…) So yeah, we took them out… I ate a bit of the congee, it tasted pretty ick and then my lips started tingling (for anyone that doesn’t know about anaphylactic shock- that’s not a good sign), so I stopped eating that and got some naan instead. 😛

The night was peppered with sightings of sickly sweet couples holding hands, the ladies holding bunches of flowers and or balloons in their other dainty palms. I don’t think I’ll ever go shopping on Valentines ever again, I swear I’ve never noticed all the mini-bouquets before… Ugh

So when we got home I decided, you know what? I really feel like watching “Across the Universe” (because I didn’t the other night), and so I watched half of it by myself before mum came in and told me I needed to go to bed.

At which point, naturally, I sat down to write this post to you all before I go to bed… well, try to go to bed… I think the guilt of the lack of work might keep me up until I decide to be productive. Mind you I was up really late last night (3:30am…) and so I’m more than a bit tired now. Hmm. Who knows.

Tomorrow night is Chinese New Year celebrations with my friends then time to HIT DA CLUBS! RAISE DA ROOF! UN-TZ UN-TZ UN-TZ and all that… hahaha. Really excited, it’s been so long since I’ve danced!

Night all! 😀

Image

Just Played My Last Game… (Warning: Lots of Tags and Long Post)

jfbewkb

So that’s it. I’m done. I’ll never wear these boots again for my school (or ever again if I don’t play at Uni…). I’ll never be in another school championship. I’ll never get another gold medal for basketball. My high-school basketball career is officially over.

My participation in competitive sports at school is officially over.

I decided not to trial for the netball team. I cried, I felt guilty to my stomach and sad deep in my heart, but it’s the sensible decision. The right decision. The mature decision.

*sobs*

I hate knowing that this is it. School really is ending. I can’t wait to leave, but I’m not so sure I’m ready to leave everything I’ve worked so hard to  build up over the last 14 years.

My mum will never coach me again,  I will never play on the same team as my sister ever again. My co-captain will never be my co-captain ever again. They will never make me feel like an outsider or a try-hard ever again. They won’t make me feel inadequate  Except they already have and do… They’re all on the netball team. I should be on the netball team. 66 girls showed up for the trials today. I could have been the 67th.

I spoke with the coaches at lunchtime and they were really upset (which is a lovely compliment that only broke my heart more). I want to be there playing alongside the girls I’ve played netball with for 12 years. I don’t care that I feel short and fat next to them, that they make me feel slow or clumsy. I just want to be there.

But they all do A-Levels and I do IB. They have exams in 4 months… mine are in 2.

I don’t know if I’ve faced loss at this level before. Family members, fellow students, pets, people moving country, sure I’ve dealt with that. But losing a “life-long career” of sport at my school? I’ll never be known as “the coach’s daughter” at my Uni. I’ll never be shouted at by coaches at schools here again. All the friends I’ve made through sports will be left in the dust when I move on to Australia.

What I think I hate most/ am most disappointed by, is myself. I used to be a great player. I kinda suck now. I went from being starting 5, to being 6th man. Sure I’m still on the team… but falling from grace (if you will) is a hard pill to swallow- even if my mother/coach doesn’t seem to think I care. I do care. I’ve always cared.

I started and finished tonight’s game. We won, yay and all that, but we didn’t feel like a team that just won SEASAC together, we didn’t mesh. It didn’t feel like a final, it didn’t feel like anything when I walked off that court as the final buzzer went.

I think that’s what’s most upsetting for me. The game wasn’t spectacular, I wasn’t spectacular, the teamwork wasn’t there, I felt useless. I’ll never be able to redeem myself as a player in my teammate’s eyes. Sure that’s a minor problem that shouldn’t phase me in comparison to all the other things I have on my plate, but I can’t help that it bugs me.

I want to cry about it, just get the damn emotions out, but I can’t seem to be able to turn on my waterworks- mind you they are ever so sensitive at the moment. I cry at everything (and what’s worse is my whole family is using it against me). I just want to have this whole high-school ordeal over with.

It feels so weird to put my boots away knowing I’ll never pick them up again unless I chose to play with mum’s weekend team… which just ended their latest season. Drats. Forgot that. So yeah, looks like that’s it for me basketball-wise.

You know how the other day I said I wasn’t feeling sorry for myself? Well, today I am. I feel so shitty about myself. On top of that my procrastination has led me to have 2 big deadlines tomorrow that I CAN get done tonight… it’ll just be a late night- which means tomorrow will be emotional and tiring.

I can’t handle being nice. I can’t handle my emotions sabotaging my mood. Sometimes I just want to be left the fuck alone, but then a friend walks by and doesn’t stop and I feel bone-achingly lonely at the rejection, but if they say hi, my boiling point goes through the roof- then I feel guilty. I hate being a girl. I hate being a girl. I hate being a girl.

Right now, I’m not stable enough to be at school and too wound up to be at home. I wonder what it’d be like to just skip school in the legit way. Head into school, hide somewhere ’til the drop-off hubbub dies down, then find a way to sneak of campus and ride the MRT all day until it’s pick up time. I know I don’t have the guts to do it. I know my parents don’t have the sympathy to let me off school for the day. I know my sister is too much a bitch to just keep her fat, pouty, bitch mouth shut.

On that note- I have planned my Valentine’s Day. It’ll be my 17th one alone (I had one wonderful Valentine’s back in the 9 months that I had a boyfriend when I was 16ish, he bought me chocolates and roses and everything, we watched ‘Fantasia’ :3). I know I could/ should hang out with my friends, to be honest I probably will end up doing the opposite of what I have planned, but here’s the plan anyway:

I will order chocolates to be delivered to my house on the 14th (or, more likely, I will buy some on the Wednesday). I will sleep in ’til 10am. Do work until 3pm. Get into pyjamas, get a box of tissues, a blanket I love, a pile of chick flicks and tissue boxes, then proceed to lock myself in the study and watch chick flicks until it’s officially Friday and I’ve “survived” that sucks-to-be-single day.

I really have no desire to spend Valentine’s with friends, bitching about boys or couples or whatever. I have no desire to organise anything, I just want to lie by myself, the single soul I am, and cry at my own pathetic need to hold to my “rules” (such as no boyfriends before Uni). I want to cry and laugh and not worry about burping or farting (I’m only human and yes there are a very privileged few that have heard the latter, the former however, is not an irregular occurrence amongst my group. We have burping competitions- I can’t even win those :/).

My current list of “To Watch”s are:

  • He’s Just Not That Into You (fave fave fave fave fave)
  • My Big Fat Greek Wedding (all time fave)
  • My Life in Ruins
  • Chicago
  • Clueless
  • The Proposal
  • Romeo + Juliet (if I’m not already on the brink of throwing myself off the roof by this point- don’t get me started on Titanic- I ain’t touching that shit… btw- by “shit” I mean: movie-that-I-will-probably-cry-myself-to-death-watching-then-resurrect-myself-so-that-I-can-jump-off-the-tallest-building-in-Singapore-before-swallowing-bleach yeah. Those kinda feels.)
  • Moulin Rouge
  • The Tourist (maybe…)
  • Pretty in Pink
  • Fantasia 1
  • Fantasia 2
  • High School Musical (don’t be dissin’)
  • Hairspray
  • Bridesmaids
  • 27 Dresses
  • The Adjustment Bureau
  • Across the Universe
  • Cry Baby
  • A Walk to Remember
  • Juno
  • Knight and Day
  • Never Been Kissed
  • EVERY DISNEY PRINCESS MOVIE EVER
  • 10 Things I Hate About You
  • 13 Going On 30
  • Made of Honour
  • The Leap Year (love love love love love)
  • The Notebook (again, if I want to die…)
  • Grease
  • How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
  • Crazy, Stupid, Love
  • What Happens in Vegas
  • The Killers
  • Stardust
  • John Tucker Must Die
  • The Princess Diaries (all)
  • Life As We Know It
  • The Back Up Plan
  • The Ugly Truth
  • Definately, Maybe
  • The Accidental Husband
  • The Lake House
  • The Breakfast Club
  • Strictly Ballroom
  • The Princess Bride
  • (One Day)
  • (Bright Star)
  • Pride and Prejudice (BBC VERSION- aka: the real version)
  • Ever After
  • Enchanted (some may not count this as Disney Princess…)
  • (Something Borrowed)
  • When in Rome
  • How to Deal (pretty much all the Mandy Moore movies, Licence to Wed!!!!- all except Because I Said So, which was terrible haha)
  • Just Like Heaven
  • TiMER
  • PS- I Love You (if I want to die)
  • (Sixteen Candles)
  • CLOUD ATLAS
  • Peter Pan
  • A Fish Called Wanda
  • (Casanova)
  • Les Mis (grudgingly… only because Aaron Tveit *ovaries explode*)

Not enough hours in the day I know. The list is in no particular order and needless to say all (well most, lets say 98%) made me cry. Brackets around the film indicate that I haven’t actually seen the film yet.

Yeah. A lot of movies. Lots of tears. I’ll probably die of dehydration from crying so much, then they’d have to kick the door down days later to find my body twisted in the throes of heartbreak and perfectly preserved in the freezing aircon. The ceremony will be short and sweet and people will go “look at that plain face, no wonder she didn’t have a boyfriend”. Yeah. What a way to go, huh?

OR

I could keep my shit together and go party it up at the clubs with my friends because one of them is born on Valentines.

*Sigh*

Tough decisions.

To be honest, making that list made me very, very happy. I don’t know why, I was perfectly miserable at the start of this post, but now I’m quite light-hearted. I guess at the end of the day: I’m a simple soul, I don’t need much to impress me or keep me happy. Just books and good company (that knows when to fuck off and when to cuddle me). For once I want to be the little spoon.

I told my friend that today. She said: “I wonder if guys ever feel like that?”

Good point. So I stick it to all you guys out there that have managed to read this far- do you ever want to be the little spoon? Or is it a masculine-protective thing to be the big spoon?

I know because of my height I always, ALWAYS, am the “protective” cuddler if my friends need a hug.

Again- my school friends reading this, my emotions are frigging out of control, please don’t bring this up at school (I’m kind of hoping this goes without saying so that I don’t have to continually put this warning label at the end..) for all I know I could be happy as Larry tomorrow and feeling guilty for posting such negativity… who knows. I sure as hell don’t.

Anyway, off to CAS and Philosophy. Then bed (if there’s any time left…).

My Hot Digs

My Hot Digs

This is my bunker man, I’ll upload more pictures… maybe… later, but for the meantime, this is where I crash at the end of a good day sailing.

Except. No sailing today. But you all already know that- well if you follow my blog at least, haha (Y)

ITS CHRISTMAS EVE TOMORROW EVERYONE!!! WOOOO!!!! I might not be getting presents, but I’m getting enough chocolate in my stocking to make my teeth fall out in compensation! Hahaha.

Hope you’re all having a wonderful festive season!

If you’re near a cute single guy and some mistletoe then GRAB HIM QUICK and snog him. *Sigh* I wish I could… :/

Yes, I’m feeling particularly mopey at the moment, no boyfriends Ben and Jerry to cheer me up at the moment. My good girlfriend Wendy, however, has my back. Sweet Wendy. (That’s a Wendy’s icecream in case any of you don’t know… a Chocolate Megashake to be precise.)

Yeah, it’s 10 to midnight now so I better go and unroll my bed. Post to you all tomorrow!

(Look at me, blogging twice in a day!! Feels good haha)

Image

Previous Older Entries